Please Cheat On Me Then Dump Me

I recently saw a girlfriend whom I hadn't seen in years. She looked AMAZING. She was already thin when I knew her before, but she's now BONE THIN. Super hot.

I told her that she's lost a ton of weight, and I asked her what she did. She told me that she was depressed after she found out her boyfriend cheated on her, and she didn't eat much after that. She just had no appetite.

Holy shit.

Jackpot.

Finally a diet plan that doesn't involve increasing my hours of cardio or cutting out carbs.

What I need is heartache. Heartache strong enough to rob me of my appetite. And if I lose my will to live along the way, well, fuck it! It'll be worth it!

So now I really need a man. It's no longer just about the sex and desire for a drinking buddy. It's now pertinent that he rips my heart to shreds so that I can finally have the body I've always fantasized about.

Come to me, box of tissues to wipe the tears and string bikinis to expose every last rib!

If any of you out there want to date me and then cheat on me, I'm all ears. Let's do this. But first you have to make me fall in love with you. If you think you're up for the challenge, add me as a friend on Facebook!

And if you choose to send me messages, please know that every word is fair game for this blog.

Heh heh...