I hope the other female bloggers don't feel all threatened and shit about that chart above, which pretty much demonstrates that my readership base is UNFUCKINGBELIEVABLY GARGANTUAN.
Now, when I address my "readers," I can be more specific by saying something like, "my 6 readers." This is where you're realizing that the chart's scale is neither in the thousands nor tens of thousands. No way, baby! I'm rocking the SINGLE DIGITS!
Don't worry. I won't let this get to my head. For now. I can't promise I'll remain so down-to-earth once I hit the double-digits. That's a whole different ballpark, motherfuckers! But I know I'll get there. I'm going to ride my irresistible charm and razor-sharp wit straight to the top!! (Which I define as having 25 readers)
I'll continue to post my stats because I find them fucking hilarious. What on EARTH possesses me to continue to write to entertain 6 fucking people? And you must be TOTAL LOSERS and FREAKS if you actually read my bullshit! Shit! God, we need to get lives.
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